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Confidence Issue: Tracey Jewel – Married At First Sight Australia

If you were anything like us, your weekday nights revolved around being glued to the TV watching MAFS – no doubt yelling at Davina and Dean. This week we interview the beautiful Tracey Jewel on how she combats staying true to herself, cyber bullies and knowing your self worth. 

Who is Tracey Jewel? 

I think I’m a lot of different roles which is why women probably related to me on MAFS! I’m a mum, a writer, a gym junkie, A tanorexic lol, a good friend, a self development obsessor, a bit of a nerd, an ex wife x2, a partner, a domestic violence survivor and a charity ambassador.

I feel like I’ve experienced a lot in my life to date and there’s power in sharing your voice with others in the hope to make a positive impact in the world.

What made you want to be involved in MAFS?

I was giving up hope in my second happily ever after. My ex husband moved and remarried quickly and with a few failed relationships under my belt I thought why not hand my love life over to the experts!

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in getting involved in reality TV and being an author?

You need to have a strong sense of who you are to do it that’s for sure. It makes you stronger and a massive exponential growth curve. I want to be the best person I can be and doing tv and writing books definitely pushes me to grow and develop as a person.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence comes down to intention. I’m not perfect and I make mistakes but underneath it all I’m a good person. I believe in the best in myself and others and this is where my inner confidence comes from, knowing myself and owning my truth.

I also think taking care of yourself on the outside helps inner confidence as well. I’m not shy about a bit of Botox, getting my hair and nails done and I love to dress up as well as keeping fit.

What empowers you as a woman? 

For me as cheesy as this sounds it’s empowering others. If I’m making a positive difference, I feel empowered. When you gossip and bring others down it’s disempowering. You’re giving your power away when you engage in negative talk. I discuss this in my book This Goddess Means Business which is all about minding your own business first and foremost – that’s empowerment

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

It’s hard not to be affected sometimes of other people’s opinions of you – especially cyber bullying and trolling. A natural reaction is going into defensive, attaching or just shutting down. When this happens I just need to come back to me, get grounded and own my own truth.

How has confidence helped you with to step out of your comfort zone? 

I start with the end in mind. I have a clear vision for my life and I keep focused on the end game when I’m not feeling the best. Especially with nerves!

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

It’s ok to be exactly who you are.. and when you own this you are giving power to those around you to be themselves too. It’s a ripple effect! And confidence grows from there. Find your tribe.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

I love a great pencil skirt – it makes me feel feminine and confident and is perfect for a day of boardroom meetings or a dinner date!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes absolutely! In my 20s I dressed very frumpy and conservatively. Now I have no problem showing a bit of boob and curves! I totally own my body and my look now.

What women inspire you? 

Oprah of course! I look up to all kinds of women especially Malala and Rosie Batty as well as Gabrielle Bernstein and Marie Forleo. It’s empowering these women who are able to share their personal stories to better the world.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

I love this Mattea Slip Dress! A little bit skin and boob what a sexy dress to dress up in for a special event!

You can join us (and have a little treat from The Borrowed Collective in your goodie bag) at Traceys new book launch in June in AucklandWellington or Christchurch.

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Confidence Issue: Jaspreet Bola – Pickitfence

Pickitfence is a NZ cool girl blog that if you haven’t heard of, you need to go stalking ASAP. As soon as we saw her showing her latest purchases in one of her Insta Stories we were HOOKED. Law student by day, fashion stalker by night – this down to earth chick has everything covered from sorting your work wear outfit, to giving you inspiration to restyle that pretty dress as a kick ass top and pant combo. More than anything Jas makes us rethink things and change our perspective – not just on the different ways to wear black pants. 

Who is Pickitfence? 

Pickitfence is not so much a person, as it is a concept (that I made up). The name of my blog Pickitfence comes from my childhood home that always had a picket fence and has always been a place of comfort, safety and is symbolic of my happy place. I want my readers to take on the Pickitfence mentality and that is to always strive to reach your happy place, your goals, or whatever it maybe that makes you happy.

What made you want to be involved in law with the fashion world on the side?

I travelled to India when I was about 5 years old and immediately I knew I lived a very privileged life back home in New Zealand. From that point on I always wanted to help people. My law degree is so broad and I’m really starting to learn all the different things I can do with it, it’s really quite exciting. Fashion is again heavily intertwined with my upbringing. My Nan is a seamstress and I’ve been designing and styling clothes all my life. My blog has allowed me to take my love of fashion and use it to inspire confidence within others, just another way I hope I can help people.

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming a successful fashion blogger?

It definitely took an initial bit of confidence to kick off my blog and just have the courage to bite the bullet and put my creativity out into the world. But ultimately, the blogging journey itself has gradually enhanced my confidence. I have met so many new people, I have collaborated with amazing brands and gained a wealth of fashion knowledge, all of which has been incredibly valuable in improving my self-confidence. I do not believe that we have to start off as perfectly confident people, I think we just have to take the first step and naturally we just evolve and get better, and learn to perfect our craft and in turn that confidence will come.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

I have learnt the hard way just how important confidence is because I’m not a naturally confident person. I have missed a lot of opportunities by simply not being confident enough. But if you just start saying yes to things and dive in and take risks, I do believe they pay off and the more opportunities you say yes to and the more risks you take, confidence organically grows. Whether it’s in fashion, where it takes a certain level of confidence to pull off a querky outfit, or at law school where speaking up is imperative to being successful, the more I say yes to things and experience new things, my confidence has just grown. It’s about creating this positive-confidence-enchancing-cycle for yourself.

What empowers you as a woman? 

Other successful women. It’s absolutely fundamental that we as woman recognise that if another female is successful, that does not mean that there is less for us. There is plenty to go around and room for us all, and it’s important to view the success of our fellow sisters as motivating and inspiring factors. Having this perspective has allowed me to be empowered by all the amazing woman around me.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

As someone who is quite a perfectionist, rejection is something that really knocks down my confidence. I always strive to put my best foot forward and when this is not good enough, it’s quite the blow. To overcome this I always reflect on the situation and analyse what I could have done better and how I can improve that for the future. We are all human and being self aware and recognising my weaknesses allows me to get over the situation.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

I believe that the closer we get to the true essence of who we are, the more confident and happy we will be. I don’t think this is by any means easy, but having new experiences whether that’s meeting new people, a new job or travel is imperative to this self growth and recognition. It is through these experiences we come to realise who we truly are, what we want from life and what our goals are. Confidence is both a starting point and an element that is intertwined throughout this self-evolving process. I think age is also a factor, we may think we know it all right now but with age comes confidence too, so don’t rush the process.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A blazer! It’s definitely having its trend moment right now, but I’ve been wearing blazers since high school (and no we did not have a uniform). A good blazer can take you anywhere, and can flatter any and every body shape. It’s a staple and makes me feel my best.

 Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Absolutely. Fashion was always a way for me to feel beautiful and more confident. As my confidence has grown I have been open to so many more silhouettes I may not have tried earlier on. For example, instead of only wearing what is conventionally considered flattering for my body shape, I am now confident enough to just wear what ever I love the look and feel of!

What women inspire you? 

Aimee Song from the blog Song of Style is a huge inspiration for me. She is not perfect but she is unapologetically herself and that makes her perfect to me. I have followed her for over six years now and I have seen her evolve from a fashion icon into an activist in her own right and I really respect that about her.

What is your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

My favourite piece from The Borrowed Collective is the Talulah Immediacy Maxi in blood orange, it’s a super flattering cut and the colour would pop on any skin tone. I also love the Rebecca Vallance Midi Dress – wow that is one stunning number!

You can find the gorgeous Jas at Pickitfence on her Instagram or on Youtube! xx

 

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Confidence Issue: Kendra Alexandra – Stolen Inspiration

We’ve been following Kendra since way back in the day when Tumblr was the Instagram of social media. Since starting her blog  Stolen Inspiration at 15, Kendra has achieved huge success and worked along side many incredible brands.  This self taught photographer/girlboss chats to us about having confidence within yourself, inner strength and being your own best friend.

Who is Kendra Alexandra?  

A very indecisive fashion obsessed woman that has no idea where she will end up living tomorrow.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

I actually kind of fell into it. When I was 15 I had a friend that shared my love of fashion and she introduced me to the world of fashion blogging. We both started our blogs then and I have had mine ever since. I never thought it would give me such a foot in the door because at 15 it was only ever a hobby – what’s come from it I could have never imagined!

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming a successful fashion blogger?


Yes, and no. Like I said I started my blog at 15 which was a really awkward time in my life when I was trying to navigate high school and find my own sense of self. At this time, I really didn’t have much self confidence at all. My blog has grown with me though and in a way my blog has helped me build self confidence over the years – especially since it’s thrown me into so many different situations that I could never have imagined happening. In return, my blog developed and grew because of it.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence to me is having a really good sense of self and self-worth. It’s knowing your limits and never budging on them. In my everyday life I just try to be kind to myself because at the end of the day you really do need to be your own best friend. I’ve taught myself to deal with criticism pretty well over the years so I never let people’s attitudes towards me or bad situations get me down because life’s just to short to let the bullshit affect you.

What empowers you as a woman? 

I love surrounding myself with great friends and family. There’s nothing more empowering than having a great support system and being inspired by those who are closest to you!

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

For me it’s definitely my own self doubt. I’m constantly second guessing the things I do and worrying that I’m not getting to where I want to be as quick as I’d like. On days like these I like to take a step back and remember that there’s more than one path to success and you can’t compare yourself to others because they’re completely different to you.

How has confidence helped you with to step out of your comfort zone, especially moving overseas? 

Travelling was a major step out of my comfort zone but I’m definitely so much more confident because of it. I think moving overseas by yourself really helps you appreciate how strong you are. There are so many situations I can look back on now and be proud of myself for dealing with them on my own without panicking, haha. I definitely think you gain the most from stepping out of your comfort zone – embrace it.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Like I said before, you have to be your own best friend and partner in crime. If you don’t like how a certain situation makes you feel – change it. Even if that means cutting people out of your life, it WILL be worth it. Life isn’t going to wait around for you to find ‘the perfect person’ to travel with, or ‘the Instagram boyfriend’ to take photos for a blog you want to create; you really have to go out there and just do it yourself.

Push yourself out of your comfort zone as often as possible. And, forgive yourself when you make mistakes because you aren’t the sum of your mistakes. You are a new person everyday – different from a year ago or even yesterday. Never feel like you have to be stuck in the position you are right now because you can change it at any moment. There’s a whole heap of random advice for you, haha.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

Sometimes that’s a pretty dress, or sometimes it’s work out gear. Basically, anything I feel comfortable in otherwise I’ll just be self-conscious the whole time.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes for sure! I remember back in my university days I was so self-conscious all the time and I ended up with the strangest mix of clothing ever because I was trying to hide certain parts of my body. Now I just embrace what I know I like and don’t care what others think, which allows me to take more wardrobe risks.

What women inspire you? 

Mostly my friends and family. It’s so inspiring to hear real life stories about the people you love. You quickly realise that no one ever has an easy ride through life, but it’s incredible to find out what they’ve come through. My Mum, for example, lived in the forest in Papua New Guinea for seven years when she was my age – that’s such a crazy contrast to my life now and so daring!

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Sir The Label Ischia Mini Dress – I’ve been thinking about buying it since it came out, it’s so cute for Summer!

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Confidence Issue: Megan Hutchison

This week in our confidence issue series we interview Megan, girl boss behind She said yes, The Little White Book & Skin Sonic.

Who is Megan Hutchison? 

I am the editor of She Said Yes, creator of the little white book wedding organiser and diary, and more recently, Skin Sonic, a vibrating facial cleansing tool.

A lot of people also know me as a social influencer, which is really a side-effect of my business, rather than defining who I am. First and foremost I am a wife, sister and friend.

What made you want to be involved in the wedding world, leading you to write your first book?

I felt the process of wedding planning is perceived to be difficult, time-consuming and expensive. I felt I could help brides to actually enjoy their engagement by making it more simple and stress-free.

I want to reduce pressures and expectations on women while helping them plan their dream day,  realise that it doesn’t have to be expensive to be wonderful, and that there’s no such thing as “perfect.”

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming such a successful author and now blogger?

Yes, absolutely. It’s not about having the confidence that it’s all going to go well, but rather the confidence to take risks. Failure is part of the journey.

I have a very “IDGAF” attitude to most things – I don’t care what people think of me, I have the confidence to be my real, authentic self, which is very freeing.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence means being unapologetically yourself. I am confident in my own skin, without make up, without pretence, whether I’m in my gym gear and jandals, or my favourite dress.

What empowers you as a woman? 

Other women lifting each other up. There is room in this world for us all to be successful. Another woman’s success does not undermine your own.

Recently I have been so incredibly touched by the generosity of women helping me to grow my second business, Skin Sonic, and so empowered to be among so many businesswomen who want us ALL to be successful.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

Not much. Making mistakes is always frustrating, but every failure is a lesson. Trying on an old favourite dress, only to realise it doesn’t fit, can suck, but it’s also the reality of growing up, and putting my health before my vanity.

What is your top tip on encouraging women to feel empowered?

Believe in yourself and give zero f*cks. I haven’t actually read the book “The life changing magic of not giving a f*ck” but it sounds like a great read for women who don’t yet feel empowered to be themselves.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

If you are reading this and hiring designer dresses, you are among the most fortunate 1% of women in the world.

Your life is too short to spend wasting wanting to be something better or someone else – you are so lucky to be you, to have the opportunities you have and the country you live in.

Don’t take social media too seriously and follow only those people who make you feel good about yourself.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A well fitting pair of high waisted jeans.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes, I dress for myself much more than I did when I was younger – trying to dress in a way I thought looked “cool” even if it wasn’t my style.

What women inspire you? 

Every woman in my life is a strong, confident and inspirational person in some way. My sister is so kind and generous and that is an inspiration.

Every woman I follow online, who is her real, authentic self, is an inspiration.

 

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Confidence Issue: Sunniva Holt

Sometimes life can get a little overwhelming and you get stuck in a cycle of what you should be doing, or where you should be going next. Sunniva is one of our favourite ladies to go to for a little inspiration and kick ass attitude that can always turn your thinking around. Towards your career, your relationships and especially yourself.

 

Who is Sunniva Holt? 

36 year old Transformation & Wealth Alignment Coach, Best Selling Author & Property Developer. I’m based in Auckland but I spend a lot of time traveling for work.

What made you want to be involved in the business world, making your way on your own?

For me there was never any other option. I wanted complete freedom in my life, and that meant both financial freedom and not working for someone else. And now through my coaching work I’m able to help others create that same freedom in their lives, which for me is absolutely living the dream!

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence to me means feeling good in my body and loving who I am exactly the way I am

What empowers you as a woman?

Self awareness. The more I get to know myself, the more empowered I become

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

To be honest, lack of sleep! I’m like a toddler, when I’m tired the wheels fall off and everything feels like a much bigger deal than it actually is. So for me its important to focus on getting plenty of quality sleep

How has confidence helped you with being such a successful entrepreneur and helping others do the same?

When you know who you are and you’re confident in that, you become unshakeable. So its a key thing in the work that I teach, owning your space and having absolute self belief.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Love yourself exactly where you’re at right now no matter where that is.

 

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

A great dress, that in alignment with who I am and embodies how I want to feel at the time.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Absolutely! Style is such a beautiful form of expression and it can be really powerful. It really is an extension of our personalities

 

What women inspire you?

Jacinda Arden – so proud to be a New Zealander right now! Oprah Winfrey and one of my amazing mentors Alexi Panos.

 

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Associates Mini Dress!It shows off my long legs, and is perfect for summer celebrations! 

You can find Sunniva over on her Instagram or website. Pictured below: Sunniva in our Alexandra Dress

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Confidence Issue: Mary Wyszomierska

This week we chat to the gorgeous Mary. Total hustler, girl boss and fashion lover. One of the first TBC girls to get involved since opening our UK store. Mary talks to us about moving countries for your career and University as well as how her love of fashion and admirable work ethic came about.

Who is Mary Wyszomierska? 

A 22 year old Fashion Marketing student. Born in Poland, studying in UK. I am all about fashion and I love avocados.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

I always loved dressing up and I put a lot of thought into my outfits when I was 9 or 10 but I developed my interest at the age of 15 when I set up my own brand based on personalised handmade t-shirts. Firstly, I was just making them for my family and friends but then things started getting more serious and I created a Facebook page and Instagram account for the brand and started selling them. Since that time I’ve completed a couple of internships in fashion, worked for quite a few brands and moved out to study fashion degree in UK.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Living for my passion and doing what I love the best I can. Fashion gives me a lot of confidence on a daily basis, from the way I dress through constantly developing my knowledge and broadening my interest in this area to dreaming about a bright future in the job of my dreams.

What empowers you as a woman? 

My closest friends and family that support me in my decisions.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

Comparing myself to others often knocks down my confidence but I am usually too busy to spend more than a minute thinking about it, haha.

How has confidence helped you with moving countries and juggling studying as well as working part time in fashion? 

Moving countries for university was a big step for me but my interest and a lot of ambition reassured me in my decisions. I knew I wanted to get an education in fashion and I wouldn’t be able to get it in Poland so there was only one way for me. I am also a strong believer that there’s nothing you can’t do, so I just went for it.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Everyone is capable of doing absolutely anything. Find your strongest qualities and work with them. Don’t fear your flaws – everyone has them. Instead, find what you love doing and start doing it and when it makes you happy, you will feel more confident.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

My staple enormous black sunglasses! It is definitely a confidence trigger.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

I can’t believe I’m saying this but I used to be a bit of a skater girl a couple years back. Nike shoes, baggy jeans, so many bright colours, I would probably never wear it again. As a teenager I was trying to fit in with my peers and today I just wear what suits my style and what I really love. My style is definitely classier and more classic now.

What women inspire you? 

Caring and ambitious women with a passion. I am lucky I know many inspiring women I’ve worked with, am friends with or they’re my family. Other than that a singer Banks is my role model on many levels – I’m just obsessed with her.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The dress that was my first rental – A Heart of Gold. It has gold details which obviously is a yes! for me and the shape I absolutely adore. I love everything about it.

 

You can find Mary on Instagram here x

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Confidence Issue: Iyia Liu

Iyia Liu first became known to us, when the media published a story on her business showcasing how a 23 year old New Zealander paid Kylie Jenner $200,000 to post a picture of her promoting Iyia’s waist trainers. Two years on and Iyia is a total girl boss, self made multi – millionaire with a few more business ventures under her Gucci belt.

Who is Iyia Liu?

24 year old girl from Auckland, North Shore! Loves dogs, fashion and food.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion/beauty world and want to create your own business within it?

I’ve always loved the idea of buying and selling online. From a young age I felt that this was a sort of passive income. You purchase something, re-brand it, market it, promote it, and it sells online, and you don’t have to do a lot or trade your time for money, so I’ve sold multiple products that I have an interest in myself.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence is being able to be yourself, to be able to feel

What empowers you as a woman?

Knowledge. The more I learn, the more I feel empowered.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

Sometimes snarky comments for example on a news article, or even comparing myself to others. But I get over it pretty quickly, I just think about all the positive things in my life, and to the mean comments, I’m assuming that the people that write those comments must have a pretty dud life themselves, or they wouldn’t be spending their time, probably alone, writing nasty things about strangers online.

How has confidence helped you with starting up your waist training business and then going on to start Luxe Fitness?

There have been times where I had been embarrassed about starting my own business, in the very beginning – you know, when you’re not doing so well, and you think “people are probably making fun of me or laughing at my expense about it.”, but you sort of just need to overcome those thoughts and push on, waist trainer I was a little nervous, but Luxe Fitness I was much more confident because I knew what I was doing a little bit more.

Do you see being a successful entrepreneur helping empower other women? If so, how?

Yes – since my stories in the media, I’ve had hundreds of people, a lot of them women, contacting me that they started their own business because of my story, and that my story gave them that confidence. It’s amazing, but it’s true – if I can do it, you can do it too.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

When I was younger, I really did care about what people thought about me. I would change the way I acted towards different people, some times do things out of my character just to impress people. And over time, you just learn that theres no point. Focus on yourself, focus on improving yourself, improving your life, and you’ll find you live a much happier and fulfilled life this way.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

My favourite feature are my legs, so I like to wear shorts, or a dress or skirt and heels to elongate them!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

I can’t really remember what I used to wear compared to now, but I do love to wear unique and more out there stuff vs comfortable clothing, and I definitely think confidence does influencer your dress sense,

What women inspire you?

Mostly business women – Sophia Amouruso (Nastygal Founder), Kylie Jenner, Tammy Hembrow – women that are driven, strategic and smart.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Talulah Shadow Dance Crossover Minidress – I love the cut of it and the colour and frills are so pretty!

 

You can find Iyia on her website or instagram x