Tag: girlboss

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Confidence Issue: Stephanie Bellamy – Personal Stylist NZ & UK

Who is Stephanie Bellamy?  

A personal stylist on the wrong side of her 20’s, she lives in Auckland and works between the UK and New Zealand. She likes to think she’s got her shit together, she loves a wine and a good laugh.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been fashion and clothing obsessed. I used to knit and sew with my nana when I was little – making clothes for myself and my Barbies. I was never sure exactly what I wanted to do within the fashion realm, as it is so vast, but I knew after my first year at university that I was on the right path towards finding my dream job.

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming a successful international personal stylist?

Hugely, I only completed my personal styling diploma just over a year ago and I didn’t feel “ready” to dive straight into a business, however, I knew that I was as ready as I will ever be. Everytime I felt an ounce of self-doubt, I would remember back to university, we had Karen Walker do a Q&A with us, she said that if you want to be a designer, you have to call yourself a designer from day 1. I applied this level of confidence and self-assertiveness to starting my business, then took the bull by the horns and haven’t looked back.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence to me, is having a solid understanding of who you are; why you do the things you do, your values, your priorities, your strengths and weaknesses, knowing your limits and then allowing yourself to make mistakes and grow from that. If we have a solid grasp on who we are, then no one else can tell us any different. I think that is the foundation of obtaining self-worth and confidence.

What empowers you as a woman? 

My job, being a personal stylist is so empowering in itself – the essence of my brand is not superficial, yes I can help my clients to build an incredible wardrobe, but what is at the forefront of my goals with each client is to help them to feel fabulous and to discover a whole new level of confidence for themselves.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

We all have invalidating experiences throughout life, some that knock us around endlessly. Over time and many, many invalidating experiences I have finally learnt that every time we have a negative experience we can take something away from it. For me, if I analyse the way in which I dealt with the experience I will always know how to better deal with it next time – and it’s always paid off!

How has confidence helped you with to step out of your comfort zone, especially considering you work between NZ and the UK? 

If I didn’t feel confident and secure within myself, I would never have been able to establish my business across both NZ and the UK. Knowing that I’m capable, I’m skilled, I’m passionate and I’m determined drove the confidence within that helped me get to where I am today and where I want to be tomorrow.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Don’t change yourself to fit the mould, discover yourself and embrace it. Surround yourself with like minded people that you enjoy being around, stop wasting energy on negative people that bring you down or emotionally drain you. Always strive to be the best possible version of you.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A leather jacket – something about it says “move out of the way, bad ass coming through” plus the versatility and durability of a leather jacket totally validates the cost of one!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Without a doubt! That’s why I love my job and it’s exactly why I do what I do.

What women inspire you? 

All mothers inspire me, all business women inspire me, any woman that has gone through a difficult period in her life and has come out the other side stronger inspires me. Women who empower other women inspire me.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Associates Mini dress, it’s super versatile and fits like a glove! I recently featured this dress in a blog post where I talk about how to best style a summery dress in the colder months.

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Confidence Issue: Simone Anderson – Journey To Health

We’ve been following Simone since she first appeared on the Tyra Banks Show. Her journey has inspired so many women in New Zealand and globally. This week we interview Simone on what makes her so confident and how we can all inject a little bit more self love into our lives.

Who is Simone Anderson?

I truly am your every day kiwi chick, just wanting to make a difference in the world. I began quite selfishly sharing my 92kg weight loss journey online to keep myself accountable. Before long my social pages grew quite a large following (now reaching nearly 600,000 people) and have now become my full time job. I help inspire others daily by being raw and truthful, sharing everything from workouts, beauty routines to recipes and outfit posts. Showing people that a simple mindset change can lead you to a live you only dreamed of.

What made you want to begin your journey to health?

It was a huge build of lots of tiny things, some as simple as being to tired to bring the bin up the driveway that made me realise I was really only living a half life and something had to change. I go into far my detail about my switch and what lead to me wanting to want changes in my book “Journey to Health”

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in initially sharing your journey online?

More than anything! From the get go this confidence made me believe in myself and truly know I was capable of anything I set my mind to.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

For me confidence is knowing what I believe in, knowing what I stand for and knowing what message I have to share. Its realising that no matter what anyone else thinks or says that I know I am making even a small difference in this world!

What empowers you as a woman?

For me I feel empowered when I realise that I don’t have to live anyone else’s life or follow anyone else’s rules for how they wish me to life. This is my life and realising I have to power to do and achieve what ever I set my mind to is empowering.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

I used to find that trolls and negative comments would really knock my confidence, I would find myself thinking and often crying about these comments or words for days. Then I had a good long think about it and realised that these people must be really struggling in themselves to find the need to be nasty to someone they don’t know online. I then started to feel sorry for these people and always meet their negative comments with kind words – kindness ALWAYS wins.

After your last surgery you had a lot of trolls that you chose to screencap and share with your followers, exposing not only the people who sent you these messages but also the awful comments you sometimes receive. Do you have any advice on how to deal with negative comments and not let it effect you?

Same as above!

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

That difference and uniqueness is what makes this world amazing, the minute we stop trying to be like everyone else and embrace ourselves “flaws” and all is the minute we realise how truly amazing we really are.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

A matching set of bra and undies always makes me feel super sexy and empowered. I love that no one else can see it, so its purely for me! How bloody cool is that!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

I have always loved fashion, clothes and accessories. I just have more options to play with and definitely have more styles that suit me so I guess this does make you more confident. I love being able to walk into any shop and know I will fit / find something that will suit me. Before I literally had one shop in Auckland I could go to!

What women inspire you?

There are so many I don’t even know where to begin. But I love woman killing it in my own backyard, I love supporting kiwi woman smashing their dreams! Girls like Riley from Healthchick101, Zoe from blessed In Doubles, Makaia Carr, Julia and Libby, Jessica Quinn & Donielle Brooke just to name a few – these ladies all shine in their own unique way and all make the world a better place! Sharing there experiences and highs and lows with the world, its truly humbling seeing them smashing their goals and dreams!

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Tower of Power. Its sexy, beautiful and feminine!

 

 

Rent Simone’s pants in black here

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Confidence Issue: Sarah Walsh – Key To Life Trust

Mental illness is something that has touched all of us. Either personally or through someone we love. Sarah Walsh is an incredible woman raising money for the Key To Life Trust raising awareness for mental health and suicide. We interviewed her this week in our confidence issue to hear a little more about her inspiring journey.

Who is Sarah Walsh? 

I’m still trying to find out! I’m a 24 year old, who lives in Wellington and am working my dream job at MediaWorks. Riding the wave of ups and downs my life brings me with my cute cat Roxy and my amazing family!

What made you want to be involved with the Key To Life Charitable Trust??

It was my mum who told me about Key to Life Charitable Trust after sharing a video on Facebook with Mike King campaigning for mental health awareness and suicide prevention and I thought, finally! Someone is speaking out in New Zealand and actively working towards a goal – I have to be involved in this!!

After being diagnosed with Bipolar disorder in 2016, for so long I had no one to look to for hope, I felt like no one else understood and that no one was talking about it, I felt like an outsider and alone in my battle. After meeting a lot of other people involved with KTL I felt like I had an instant connection with them and that I had to spread the message of love, hope and awareness and most importantly a change in attitude.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

I feel that confidence can be a fickle thing, at the end of the day you must rely on yourself for it as confidence should come from within. With social media it’s tough as I can often fall into the trap of looking for a validation boost, along with many others! I do struggle with self-esteem a lot but lately I’ve learned to focus on MY wins, instead of what I don’t have. Own what you do! Celebrate your wins!   

What empowers you as a woman? 

I like to challenge society’s mind set, I see that we have so much potential and so much more to achieve and I’m motivated to get there.  

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

This is actually something I find quite tough! Some days I feel like it won’t take much for me to knock my confidence down and I start doubting myself and the negative chat in my head begins, it’s awful! I always let my family know how I’m feeling and a few friends for support, people that I know I can say whatever to without them judging!
I always know in a few hours my mind will move on from it – but I just hold tight everything is temporary. I also think accepting that I feel like that is really good too, because I swear my brain wants to move on to closure rather than be stuck in denial.

How has confidence helped you with being so open about mental illness and your journey? 

In all honesty, I was really fired up! I was sick of not reading anything positive or reading about bipolar disorder being described in a horrible way. I was sick of celebrities only saying a few quotes about mental health or mental illness. I was sad that there wasn’t anyone to look up to here in NZ. (Before I found out about Key To Life). If no one is going to talk about it, I better start. It is scary, I do sometimes feel as some people are looking at me differently now I am so public with my struggles; it’s taken a lot of confidence! I want others to feel that they aren’t alone and that they are never too far from someone else who has the same struggles as they do and that we are all in this together. Sometimes I’ve had to take a few deep breaths and say to myself that I can do this, because sometimes I do doubt myself and get scared of what people will think.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Focus on your wins, your best assets! –Very short and simple but it works. Own it!

 

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A dress! Much less stressful than trying to find “Jeans and a nice top”.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes it sure has, I used to wear black a lot when I was younger (17, 18), black tee-shirt and black jeans. I was so self-conscious. Now I love colour! (I try and avoid black since it’s so hard to find in my wardrobe or to be honest my floordrobe..!)

 

What women inspire you? 

Zoe Lawton (New Zealander) who set up a #metoo blog to provide legal professionals and law students with a safe and neutral platform to share their experiences of sexual harassment, bullying and discrimination! She opened up the conversation and shed light on what is happening in our legal industry. How freaking awesome is that!? I am in awe of the courage she has to take on big legal firms because I would have been shaking in my boots.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Objective Flare Mini Dress! It’s so beautiful, I’ve never worn something like this before and I felt amazing it in.

 

You can read more on Key to Life here and follow Sarah on her journey here

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Pickitfence – 27 Dresses

Ever wanted to wear 27 designer dresses without having to buy them or have them spotted bulging out of your wardrobe door when a male journalist stops by? Well you can!

I was lucky enough collaborate with the lovely team over at The Borrowed Collective and shoot a few of my favourite pieces. I also just so happened to go out for a spot of breakfast at my favourite cafe in Mt Eden and also transform into an Oscars statue shortly after, oh what a lavish life I do live.

This was my first time ever experiencing the luxury of wearing designer dresses. The biggest stand out for me was just how flattering and incredible they make your body look!!! The material is thick and sucks you in, the lengths and seams are perfectly positioned to contour your body and create a flattering silhouette (it’s insane looking in the mirror and seeing that you can continue to love donuts the way you do). Continue Reading…

Rent the Cortona Midi here & the Sofia here

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Confidence Issue: Tracey Jewel – Married At First Sight Australia

If you were anything like us, your weekday nights revolved around being glued to the TV watching MAFS – no doubt yelling at Davina and Dean. This week we interview the beautiful Tracey Jewel on how she combats staying true to herself, cyber bullies and knowing your self worth. 

Who is Tracey Jewel? 

I think I’m a lot of different roles which is why women probably related to me on MAFS! I’m a mum, a writer, a gym junkie, A tanorexic lol, a good friend, a self development obsessor, a bit of a nerd, an ex wife x2, a partner, a domestic violence survivor and a charity ambassador.

I feel like I’ve experienced a lot in my life to date and there’s power in sharing your voice with others in the hope to make a positive impact in the world.

What made you want to be involved in MAFS?

I was giving up hope in my second happily ever after. My ex husband moved and remarried quickly and with a few failed relationships under my belt I thought why not hand my love life over to the experts!

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in getting involved in reality TV and being an author?

You need to have a strong sense of who you are to do it that’s for sure. It makes you stronger and a massive exponential growth curve. I want to be the best person I can be and doing tv and writing books definitely pushes me to grow and develop as a person.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence comes down to intention. I’m not perfect and I make mistakes but underneath it all I’m a good person. I believe in the best in myself and others and this is where my inner confidence comes from, knowing myself and owning my truth.

I also think taking care of yourself on the outside helps inner confidence as well. I’m not shy about a bit of Botox, getting my hair and nails done and I love to dress up as well as keeping fit.

What empowers you as a woman? 

For me as cheesy as this sounds it’s empowering others. If I’m making a positive difference, I feel empowered. When you gossip and bring others down it’s disempowering. You’re giving your power away when you engage in negative talk. I discuss this in my book This Goddess Means Business which is all about minding your own business first and foremost – that’s empowerment

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

It’s hard not to be affected sometimes of other people’s opinions of you – especially cyber bullying and trolling. A natural reaction is going into defensive, attaching or just shutting down. When this happens I just need to come back to me, get grounded and own my own truth.

How has confidence helped you with to step out of your comfort zone? 

I start with the end in mind. I have a clear vision for my life and I keep focused on the end game when I’m not feeling the best. Especially with nerves!

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

It’s ok to be exactly who you are.. and when you own this you are giving power to those around you to be themselves too. It’s a ripple effect! And confidence grows from there. Find your tribe.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

I love a great pencil skirt – it makes me feel feminine and confident and is perfect for a day of boardroom meetings or a dinner date!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes absolutely! In my 20s I dressed very frumpy and conservatively. Now I have no problem showing a bit of boob and curves! I totally own my body and my look now.

What women inspire you? 

Oprah of course! I look up to all kinds of women especially Malala and Rosie Batty as well as Gabrielle Bernstein and Marie Forleo. It’s empowering these women who are able to share their personal stories to better the world.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

I love this Mattea Slip Dress! A little bit skin and boob what a sexy dress to dress up in for a special event!

You can join us (and have a little treat from The Borrowed Collective in your goodie bag) at Traceys new book launch in June in Auckland,  Wellington or Christchurch.

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Confidence Issue: Jaspreet Bola – Pickitfence

Pickitfence is a NZ cool girl blog that if you haven’t heard of, you need to go stalking ASAP. As soon as we saw her showing her latest purchases in one of her Insta Stories we were HOOKED. Law student by day, fashion stalker by night – this down to earth chick has everything covered from sorting your work wear outfit, to giving you inspiration to restyle that pretty dress as a kick ass top and pant combo. More than anything Jas makes us rethink things and change our perspective – not just on the different ways to wear black pants. 

Who is Pickitfence? 

Pickitfence is not so much a person, as it is a concept (that I made up). The name of my blog Pickitfence comes from my childhood home that always had a picket fence and has always been a place of comfort, safety and is symbolic of my happy place. I want my readers to take on the Pickitfence mentality and that is to always strive to reach your happy place, your goals, or whatever it maybe that makes you happy.

What made you want to be involved in law with the fashion world on the side?

I travelled to India when I was about 5 years old and immediately I knew I lived a very privileged life back home in New Zealand. From that point on I always wanted to help people. My law degree is so broad and I’m really starting to learn all the different things I can do with it, it’s really quite exciting. Fashion is again heavily intertwined with my upbringing. My Nan is a seamstress and I’ve been designing and styling clothes all my life. My blog has allowed me to take my love of fashion and use it to inspire confidence within others, just another way I hope I can help people.

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming a successful fashion blogger?

It definitely took an initial bit of confidence to kick off my blog and just have the courage to bite the bullet and put my creativity out into the world. But ultimately, the blogging journey itself has gradually enhanced my confidence. I have met so many new people, I have collaborated with amazing brands and gained a wealth of fashion knowledge, all of which has been incredibly valuable in improving my self-confidence. I do not believe that we have to start off as perfectly confident people, I think we just have to take the first step and naturally we just evolve and get better, and learn to perfect our craft and in turn that confidence will come.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

I have learnt the hard way just how important confidence is because I’m not a naturally confident person. I have missed a lot of opportunities by simply not being confident enough. But if you just start saying yes to things and dive in and take risks, I do believe they pay off and the more opportunities you say yes to and the more risks you take, confidence organically grows. Whether it’s in fashion, where it takes a certain level of confidence to pull off a querky outfit, or at law school where speaking up is imperative to being successful, the more I say yes to things and experience new things, my confidence has just grown. It’s about creating this positive-confidence-enchancing-cycle for yourself.

What empowers you as a woman? 

Other successful women. It’s absolutely fundamental that we as woman recognise that if another female is successful, that does not mean that there is less for us. There is plenty to go around and room for us all, and it’s important to view the success of our fellow sisters as motivating and inspiring factors. Having this perspective has allowed me to be empowered by all the amazing woman around me.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

As someone who is quite a perfectionist, rejection is something that really knocks down my confidence. I always strive to put my best foot forward and when this is not good enough, it’s quite the blow. To overcome this I always reflect on the situation and analyse what I could have done better and how I can improve that for the future. We are all human and being self aware and recognising my weaknesses allows me to get over the situation.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

I believe that the closer we get to the true essence of who we are, the more confident and happy we will be. I don’t think this is by any means easy, but having new experiences whether that’s meeting new people, a new job or travel is imperative to this self growth and recognition. It is through these experiences we come to realise who we truly are, what we want from life and what our goals are. Confidence is both a starting point and an element that is intertwined throughout this self-evolving process. I think age is also a factor, we may think we know it all right now but with age comes confidence too, so don’t rush the process.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A blazer! It’s definitely having its trend moment right now, but I’ve been wearing blazers since high school (and no we did not have a uniform). A good blazer can take you anywhere, and can flatter any and every body shape. It’s a staple and makes me feel my best.

 Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Absolutely. Fashion was always a way for me to feel beautiful and more confident. As my confidence has grown I have been open to so many more silhouettes I may not have tried earlier on. For example, instead of only wearing what is conventionally considered flattering for my body shape, I am now confident enough to just wear what ever I love the look and feel of!

What women inspire you? 

Aimee Song from the blog Song of Style is a huge inspiration for me. She is not perfect but she is unapologetically herself and that makes her perfect to me. I have followed her for over six years now and I have seen her evolve from a fashion icon into an activist in her own right and I really respect that about her.

What is your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

My favourite piece from The Borrowed Collective is the Talulah Immediacy Maxi in blood orange, it’s a super flattering cut and the colour would pop on any skin tone. I also love the Rebecca Vallance Midi Dress – wow that is one stunning number!

You can find the gorgeous Jas at Pickitfence on her Instagram or on Youtube! xx

 

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Confidence Issue: Kendra Alexandra – Stolen Inspiration

We’ve been following Kendra since way back in the day when Tumblr was the Instagram of social media. Since starting her blog  Stolen Inspiration at 15, Kendra has achieved huge success and worked along side many incredible brands.  This self taught photographer/girlboss chats to us about having confidence within yourself, inner strength and being your own best friend.

Who is Kendra Alexandra?  

A very indecisive fashion obsessed woman that has no idea where she will end up living tomorrow.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

I actually kind of fell into it. When I was 15 I had a friend that shared my love of fashion and she introduced me to the world of fashion blogging. We both started our blogs then and I have had mine ever since. I never thought it would give me such a foot in the door because at 15 it was only ever a hobby – what’s come from it I could have never imagined!

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming a successful fashion blogger?


Yes, and no. Like I said I started my blog at 15 which was a really awkward time in my life when I was trying to navigate high school and find my own sense of self. At this time, I really didn’t have much self confidence at all. My blog has grown with me though and in a way my blog has helped me build self confidence over the years – especially since it’s thrown me into so many different situations that I could never have imagined happening. In return, my blog developed and grew because of it.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence to me is having a really good sense of self and self-worth. It’s knowing your limits and never budging on them. In my everyday life I just try to be kind to myself because at the end of the day you really do need to be your own best friend. I’ve taught myself to deal with criticism pretty well over the years so I never let people’s attitudes towards me or bad situations get me down because life’s just to short to let the bullshit affect you.

What empowers you as a woman? 

I love surrounding myself with great friends and family. There’s nothing more empowering than having a great support system and being inspired by those who are closest to you!

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

For me it’s definitely my own self doubt. I’m constantly second guessing the things I do and worrying that I’m not getting to where I want to be as quick as I’d like. On days like these I like to take a step back and remember that there’s more than one path to success and you can’t compare yourself to others because they’re completely different to you.

How has confidence helped you with to step out of your comfort zone, especially moving overseas? 

Travelling was a major step out of my comfort zone but I’m definitely so much more confident because of it. I think moving overseas by yourself really helps you appreciate how strong you are. There are so many situations I can look back on now and be proud of myself for dealing with them on my own without panicking, haha. I definitely think you gain the most from stepping out of your comfort zone – embrace it.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Like I said before, you have to be your own best friend and partner in crime. If you don’t like how a certain situation makes you feel – change it. Even if that means cutting people out of your life, it WILL be worth it. Life isn’t going to wait around for you to find ‘the perfect person’ to travel with, or ‘the Instagram boyfriend’ to take photos for a blog you want to create; you really have to go out there and just do it yourself.

Push yourself out of your comfort zone as often as possible. And, forgive yourself when you make mistakes because you aren’t the sum of your mistakes. You are a new person everyday – different from a year ago or even yesterday. Never feel like you have to be stuck in the position you are right now because you can change it at any moment. There’s a whole heap of random advice for you, haha.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

Sometimes that’s a pretty dress, or sometimes it’s work out gear. Basically, anything I feel comfortable in otherwise I’ll just be self-conscious the whole time.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes for sure! I remember back in my university days I was so self-conscious all the time and I ended up with the strangest mix of clothing ever because I was trying to hide certain parts of my body. Now I just embrace what I know I like and don’t care what others think, which allows me to take more wardrobe risks.

What women inspire you? 

Mostly my friends and family. It’s so inspiring to hear real life stories about the people you love. You quickly realise that no one ever has an easy ride through life, but it’s incredible to find out what they’ve come through. My Mum, for example, lived in the forest in Papua New Guinea for seven years when she was my age – that’s such a crazy contrast to my life now and so daring!

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Sir The Label Ischia Mini Dress – I’ve been thinking about buying it since it came out, it’s so cute for Summer!

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Confidence Issue: Megan Hutchison

This week in our confidence issue series we interview Megan, girl boss behind She said yes, The Little White Book & Skin Sonic.

Who is Megan Hutchison? 

I am the editor of She Said Yes, creator of the little white book wedding organiser and diary, and more recently, Skin Sonic, a vibrating facial cleansing tool.

A lot of people also know me as a social influencer, which is really a side-effect of my business, rather than defining who I am. First and foremost I am a wife, sister and friend.

What made you want to be involved in the wedding world, leading you to write your first book?

I felt the process of wedding planning is perceived to be difficult, time-consuming and expensive. I felt I could help brides to actually enjoy their engagement by making it more simple and stress-free.

I want to reduce pressures and expectations on women while helping them plan their dream day,  realise that it doesn’t have to be expensive to be wonderful, and that there’s no such thing as “perfect.”

Did having confidence in yourself play a big role in becoming such a successful author and now blogger?

Yes, absolutely. It’s not about having the confidence that it’s all going to go well, but rather the confidence to take risks. Failure is part of the journey.

I have a very “IDGAF” attitude to most things – I don’t care what people think of me, I have the confidence to be my real, authentic self, which is very freeing.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence means being unapologetically yourself. I am confident in my own skin, without make up, without pretence, whether I’m in my gym gear and jandals, or my favourite dress.

What empowers you as a woman? 

Other women lifting each other up. There is room in this world for us all to be successful. Another woman’s success does not undermine your own.

Recently I have been so incredibly touched by the generosity of women helping me to grow my second business, Skin Sonic, and so empowered to be among so many businesswomen who want us ALL to be successful.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

Not much. Making mistakes is always frustrating, but every failure is a lesson. Trying on an old favourite dress, only to realise it doesn’t fit, can suck, but it’s also the reality of growing up, and putting my health before my vanity.

What is your top tip on encouraging women to feel empowered?

Believe in yourself and give zero f*cks. I haven’t actually read the book “The life changing magic of not giving a f*ck” but it sounds like a great read for women who don’t yet feel empowered to be themselves.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

If you are reading this and hiring designer dresses, you are among the most fortunate 1% of women in the world.

Your life is too short to spend wasting wanting to be something better or someone else – you are so lucky to be you, to have the opportunities you have and the country you live in.

Don’t take social media too seriously and follow only those people who make you feel good about yourself.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

A well fitting pair of high waisted jeans.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes, I dress for myself much more than I did when I was younger – trying to dress in a way I thought looked “cool” even if it wasn’t my style.

What women inspire you? 

Every woman in my life is a strong, confident and inspirational person in some way. My sister is so kind and generous and that is an inspiration.

Every woman I follow online, who is her real, authentic self, is an inspiration.

 

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Confidence Issue: Sunniva Holt

Sometimes life can get a little overwhelming and you get stuck in a cycle of what you should be doing, or where you should be going next. Sunniva is one of our favourite ladies to go to for a little inspiration and kick ass attitude that can always turn your thinking around. Towards your career, your relationships and especially yourself.

 

Who is Sunniva Holt? 

36 year old Transformation & Wealth Alignment Coach, Best Selling Author & Property Developer. I’m based in Auckland but I spend a lot of time traveling for work.

What made you want to be involved in the business world, making your way on your own?

For me there was never any other option. I wanted complete freedom in my life, and that meant both financial freedom and not working for someone else. And now through my coaching work I’m able to help others create that same freedom in their lives, which for me is absolutely living the dream!

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence to me means feeling good in my body and loving who I am exactly the way I am

What empowers you as a woman?

Self awareness. The more I get to know myself, the more empowered I become

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

To be honest, lack of sleep! I’m like a toddler, when I’m tired the wheels fall off and everything feels like a much bigger deal than it actually is. So for me its important to focus on getting plenty of quality sleep

How has confidence helped you with being such a successful entrepreneur and helping others do the same?

When you know who you are and you’re confident in that, you become unshakeable. So its a key thing in the work that I teach, owning your space and having absolute self belief.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Love yourself exactly where you’re at right now no matter where that is.

 

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

A great dress, that in alignment with who I am and embodies how I want to feel at the time.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Absolutely! Style is such a beautiful form of expression and it can be really powerful. It really is an extension of our personalities

 

What women inspire you?

Jacinda Arden – so proud to be a New Zealander right now! Oprah Winfrey and one of my amazing mentors Alexi Panos.

 

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Associates Mini Dress!It shows off my long legs, and is perfect for summer celebrations! 

You can find Sunniva over on her Instagram or website. Pictured below: Sunniva in our Alexandra Dress

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Confidence Issue: Tailor Skincare – Sara Quilter

Sara Quilter is the mastermind behind Tailor Skincare, a range of natural skincare “tailored” to fit and offer endless benefits to any skin type. Not only does it feel amazing on your skin, but offers to nourish the skin from the inside & out. And who doesn’t feel more confident when their skin feels beautiful? We interviewed Sara this week on her road to becoming the successful entrepreneur she is today, who started from her Fathers shed in Wellington with a Kenwood Cake Mixer & rubber spatula.

Who is Sara Quilter? 

Who am I? I wear so many hats, I’m a dog mum who loves yoga, bad 90’s hits and singing in the car. I’m also a passionate, driven, hard working entrepreneur. I LOVE natural skincare and thrive on helping my customers build their confidence by restoring their skin health.

What does confidence mean to you?

When we have the confidence to be our authentic selves. This to me is true beauty.

What empowers you as a woman?

I’m also empowered by my regular mindfulness practice. It’s not daily but I do practice often. Just like happiness, confidence is a choice. It may appear to come easier to some, but you have the choice to be confident or not.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

Honestly, when I have a big fat breakout on my face. Yes, I still breakout and my skin is not perfect all the time. My confidence get’s knocked back but I tell myself I’m breaking out for a reason. It may be something internal (dietary) or stress. So I take some me time, which usually involves a cup of tea, some yoga, a Tailor Polish Mask or some sort of trashy TV show and relax.

How has confidence helped with the start and running of Tailor Skincare?
Interesting, because at first I didn’t have the confidence to go out and pitch to shop owners face to face so I hid behind Facebook and began my business online. Over the last 5 years I’ve really worked on my confidence and now I have no issue chatting with anyone or to any group size. To me confidence is something which can be boosted by the people you’re with, the look of your skin and the posture you hold. However if you don’t practice it, just like any skill, it won’t develop. So I’d say I haven’t always been confident, it’s something I’ve chosen to practice over and over again because it’s important to me.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves?

Confidence does not happen over night. It’s something you choose to practice and eventually your confidence will grow and develop. I also believe confidence is not something which is measurable during times of success. True confidence is measured by how gracefully you fail and pick yourself back up and try again with the same confidence in yourself. Because you’re going to fail – a lot! And thats okay because it’s just one more failure before you win! But if you don’t have the confidence to keep going you’re not going to get there. So choose to be confident and practice it as you would any other skill.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

Honestly….black yoga pants. If I’m not comfortable at work, I don’t get anything done. I wear yoga pants every single day and take on the world one task at a time. That said I LOVE slipping into a cute cocktail dress and getting my hair done. Currently obsessed with this  and this.

What women inspire you?

My mum (of course) because she’s been my biggest supporter. Marie Forleo – LOVE Marie TV, Sophia Amoruso the ultimate #girlboss and my friend Emily Ghallager – who’s a complete rockstar and runs her own biz called Conscious Boss Clique.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

It has to be this one because I LOVE it, but wouldn’t think to invest in purchasing something like this. I’d want to borrow it for a special occasion like a product launch or awards ceremony. I think that’s what’s great about the Borrowed Collective, it gives you the wardrobe of your dreams without the price tag.

Thanks so much Sara! Photos credit to: http://lolaphotography.co.nz/

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Confidence Issue: Mary Wyszomierska

This week we chat to the gorgeous Mary. Total hustler, girl boss and fashion lover. One of the first TBC girls to get involved since opening our UK store. Mary talks to us about moving countries for your career and University as well as how her love of fashion and admirable work ethic came about.

Who is Mary Wyszomierska? 

A 22 year old Fashion Marketing student. Born in Poland, studying in UK. I am all about fashion and I love avocados.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

I always loved dressing up and I put a lot of thought into my outfits when I was 9 or 10 but I developed my interest at the age of 15 when I set up my own brand based on personalised handmade t-shirts. Firstly, I was just making them for my family and friends but then things started getting more serious and I created a Facebook page and Instagram account for the brand and started selling them. Since that time I’ve completed a couple of internships in fashion, worked for quite a few brands and moved out to study fashion degree in UK.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Living for my passion and doing what I love the best I can. Fashion gives me a lot of confidence on a daily basis, from the way I dress through constantly developing my knowledge and broadening my interest in this area to dreaming about a bright future in the job of my dreams.

What empowers you as a woman? 

My closest friends and family that support me in my decisions.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

Comparing myself to others often knocks down my confidence but I am usually too busy to spend more than a minute thinking about it, haha.

How has confidence helped you with moving countries and juggling studying as well as working part time in fashion? 

Moving countries for university was a big step for me but my interest and a lot of ambition reassured me in my decisions. I knew I wanted to get an education in fashion and I wouldn’t be able to get it in Poland so there was only one way for me. I am also a strong believer that there’s nothing you can’t do, so I just went for it.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Everyone is capable of doing absolutely anything. Find your strongest qualities and work with them. Don’t fear your flaws – everyone has them. Instead, find what you love doing and start doing it and when it makes you happy, you will feel more confident.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

My staple enormous black sunglasses! It is definitely a confidence trigger.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

I can’t believe I’m saying this but I used to be a bit of a skater girl a couple years back. Nike shoes, baggy jeans, so many bright colours, I would probably never wear it again. As a teenager I was trying to fit in with my peers and today I just wear what suits my style and what I really love. My style is definitely classier and more classic now.

What women inspire you? 

Caring and ambitious women with a passion. I am lucky I know many inspiring women I’ve worked with, am friends with or they’re my family. Other than that a singer Banks is my role model on many levels – I’m just obsessed with her.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The dress that was my first rental – A Heart of Gold. It has gold details which obviously is a yes! for me and the shape I absolutely adore. I love everything about it.

 

You can find Mary on Instagram here x

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Confidence Issue: Iyia Liu

Iyia Liu first became known to us, when the media published a story on her business showcasing how a 23 year old New Zealander paid Kylie Jenner $200,000 to post a picture of her promoting Iyia’s waist trainers. Two years on and Iyia is a total girl boss, self made multi – millionaire with a few more business ventures under her Gucci belt.

Who is Iyia Liu?

24 year old girl from Auckland, North Shore! Loves dogs, fashion and food.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion/beauty world and want to create your own business within it?

I’ve always loved the idea of buying and selling online. From a young age I felt that this was a sort of passive income. You purchase something, re-brand it, market it, promote it, and it sells online, and you don’t have to do a lot or trade your time for money, so I’ve sold multiple products that I have an interest in myself.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

Confidence is being able to be yourself, to be able to feel

What empowers you as a woman?

Knowledge. The more I learn, the more I feel empowered.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

Sometimes snarky comments for example on a news article, or even comparing myself to others. But I get over it pretty quickly, I just think about all the positive things in my life, and to the mean comments, I’m assuming that the people that write those comments must have a pretty dud life themselves, or they wouldn’t be spending their time, probably alone, writing nasty things about strangers online.

How has confidence helped you with starting up your waist training business and then going on to start Luxe Fitness?

There have been times where I had been embarrassed about starting my own business, in the very beginning – you know, when you’re not doing so well, and you think “people are probably making fun of me or laughing at my expense about it.”, but you sort of just need to overcome those thoughts and push on, waist trainer I was a little nervous, but Luxe Fitness I was much more confident because I knew what I was doing a little bit more.

Do you see being a successful entrepreneur helping empower other women? If so, how?

Yes – since my stories in the media, I’ve had hundreds of people, a lot of them women, contacting me that they started their own business because of my story, and that my story gave them that confidence. It’s amazing, but it’s true – if I can do it, you can do it too.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

When I was younger, I really did care about what people thought about me. I would change the way I acted towards different people, some times do things out of my character just to impress people. And over time, you just learn that theres no point. Focus on yourself, focus on improving yourself, improving your life, and you’ll find you live a much happier and fulfilled life this way.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

My favourite feature are my legs, so I like to wear shorts, or a dress or skirt and heels to elongate them!

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

I can’t really remember what I used to wear compared to now, but I do love to wear unique and more out there stuff vs comfortable clothing, and I definitely think confidence does influencer your dress sense,

What women inspire you?

Mostly business women – Sophia Amouruso (Nastygal Founder), Kylie Jenner, Tammy Hembrow – women that are driven, strategic and smart.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Talulah Shadow Dance Crossover Minidress – I love the cut of it and the colour and frills are so pretty!

 

You can find Iyia on her website or instagram x

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Falling In Love With Paris Fashion Week Again

A week of fashion, in such a beautiful city, the city of love. What more could a girl want?!

Paris fashion week, once again, outstanding looks blessed us on the runway this year have been breathtakingly gorgeous, and not to mention the street style we have been seeing all over social media, got us drooling for days!

We saw a lot of colour on the runway this year, with a combination of different textures, fabrics and patterns to create contrasting looks that were deviating from the norm.

This has been creating staple looks differentiating each designer from the next.

There were so many shows that we absolutely loved, including Louis Vuitton SS18, Givenchy,  Balmain, which was a dream, as always, with local NZ gal, Georgia Fowler, always a pleasure watching that girl do her thang. Of course, the amazing Saint Laurent open-air extravaganza under the Eiffel Tower and Chanel with the beautiful backdrop of six waterfalls! We also loved the Celine women this year on the runway, the caped trench coats, and office chic looks, the beautiful browns and pastel colours used throughout had us dreaming. Just to name a few, we could be here forever speeling about all the amazing pieces and looks that were shown at Paris this year.

How about Balenciaga models wearing 10cm platform Crocs though, kinda loved it, but does this really make Crocs okay?! I don’t think everyone will be rushing out to own a pair of these babies anytime soon…

And we cannot forget, one of the main topics of any fashion week around the world, street style. The street style at Paris Fashion week this year, we’re seeing a lot of Autumn colours coming into the mix, which are showing very prominent in some of the most outstanding looks that we have come across. These colours were also emerging on the runway, which was definitely a positive for us, we love some warm Autumn colours here at TBC.

 

We always love a good fashion week for a bit of inspo, especially in the change of seasons and when looking for new ways to chuck together a simple but impressive outfit. Also, of course buying inspiration for the new looks that we have constantly coming your way! Get excited girls, we have a lot of neat new looks coming! Keep them eyes peeled!

Written by Lauren x

Here are some of our fave off the Catwalk looks from Paris Fashion Week:

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Confidence Issue: Eve Silcock

Eve Silcock has been on our radar for some time now. This girl boss always inspires us to head out doors, be a little more adventurous and has us hooked on all of her make up looks. This has definitely been one of our favourite confident pieces so far. I’m sure you will love it (and her) as much as we sure did!

Who is Eve Silcock?

Sometimes I feel like I live two lives! Half the time my life revolves around fashion & beauty, while the other half is all about going on adventures and exploring the wider Queenstown and Otago region. You’d find me going 4WDing and camping in the bush, or going snowboarding and ski touring in the middle of nowhere. When I’m not off grid you’d find me working on one of my businesses, I’m a sucker for punishment and am constantly spread incredibly thin across a number of projects! EVE Makeup Artistry definitely keeps me the busiest with Queenstown being a hugely popular wedding destination. This year the EVE team has grown from being just me to bringing on board a second makeup artist and a beauty therapist, which is super exciting! My second business is EVE Lashes, which I’m extremely passionate about. It’s a subscription service for false eyelashes as well as offering lashes for individual purchase too. All our lashes are cruelty-free, comfortable to wear and handmade, with a big focus on teaching makeup lovers how to apply lashes and removing the stigma that it’s too hard. Earlier this year I also decided to start a blog, which is predominately focused around fashion with a touch of beauty and lifestyle. I love creating fun outfits and I really try to focus on keeping them affordable and sharing my tips with others.

 

What made you want to be involved in the fashion/beauty world?

 

Without realising it at the time, I grew up around fashion and beauty. My sister won Miss World New Zealand in 1999 and went on to Miss World (I was 9 years old at the time), my Mum was also a makeup artist when I was young so I spent many years just watching. Throughout my teens and early 20s I always loved playing with makeup and being creative with my outfits, but never thought I’d be able to make a career out of it, so went to uni and ended up in the corporate industry. It really wasn’t until I moved to Queenstown and spent some time here that it occurred to me that I could turn the beauty and fashion thing into a career.

 

What empowers you as a woman?

 

That I can do anything I put my mind to and the fact that I’m a woman has absolutely nothing to do with it. For example, I love that not only can I slay a makeup look or put together a killer outfit and run multiple businesses, but I can also fix code on my website, winch the truck out of a situation when we go 4WDing, or be snowboarding in the backcountry in a total whiteout (not something I would recommend in hindsight haha) – all with my 2cm long stiletto nails .

 

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

 

Feeling overwhelmed with my workload and getting stressed out over it, definitely knocks my confidence. I’ve come to terms with the fact that you can’t have the highs without the lows and I always remind myself if running your own business was easy, everyone would be doing it! I have got much better at dealing with it by making a list of what is stressing me out, and breaking it down into priorities so I have a visual of what I need to focus on, one task at a time.

How has confidence helped you with starting up your own business freelancing as a makeup artist and creating EVE lashes? 

When I first moved to Queenstown I really struggled with a lot of anxiety and it stopped me from doing a lot of basic daily tasks and in those early months of living down here, at the time I would have told you didn’t have what it took to run my own business if I’m being truly honest. So I really started at zero and it’s been quite a journey to get to where I am today from a personal development and growth perspective. Basically, I spent a lot of time thinking about what I wanted for my future and the lifestyle I wanted to live. Once I came to terms with the fact that I was 100% in control of turning my “want” into a reality, I really grew as a person and so did my confidence. It made me realise I can achieve anything I put my mind to and I’ve never looked back!

 

Do you see being a makeup artist helping empower other women? If so, how?

Absolutely, every day I watch women’s reactions when they look in the mirror after I’ve finished their makeup and see their face light up and confidence increase, which is a hugely rewarding feeling knowing you’ve enhanced someone’s natural beauty and left them feeling great about themselves

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

OMG YES! I used to have so many “requirements” to make me love or buy an outfit like tops had to be long in back to cover my bum and I’d never wear anything backless because it meant I couldn’t wear a padded bra and I was so self-conscious of my small boobs. As I have got more confidence in myself and with my own appearance I have let things like this go quite a bit and I enjoy a much wider range of styles than previously I wouldn’t have worn. Also as I have got more confidence in myself it has allowed me to be more adventurous with cutting my hair really short, I love that I don’t have to have long hair to feel feminine.

 

What women inspire you? 

 

All the women I am close friends with that are running their own businesses, I see them working so hard and killing it in their industries and they really inspire me to dig deep and keep going when it all feels too hard! To name a few; Becks Robinson owner of Charlotte Lane Clothing. Laura Moore owner of Ignition Self Drive Adventures. Emily Scott owner of Waitomo Hilltop Glamping, Taryn Kelly owner of  Japan Car Culture.

 

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

 

Oh man, this is a hard one, there are so many beautiful pieces! I think if I had to pick one it would be the Malaia Dress from PIA, I think the fabric is super cute and its such a beautiful colour for Spring!

 

You can follow Eve on Instagram here or check out her website here xx

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Why This Is Our Favourite Time Of Year

If the return of daylight savings isn’t the best thing that happened to you all year then you’re lying. It somehow manages to creep up extremely quickly, and paired with it the first warm winds of spring, you’re dancing down the street bare-legged in florals in no time.

Spring means colour, fake tans, and the confidence to go out again in something that isn’t ‘jeans and a nice top’. Although our European friends in Paris at fashion week have shown us the cool warms of their autumn ahead, we can steal parts of their effortlessly cool style and incorporate it into our perky spring easily, which you can find in our top picks below.

Red has made an all-time comeback this year, and we are finding in all corners of the world and wardrobe. From a classic red lippy to those suede red mules you’ve wanted for too long, and everything in-between. We definitely are not complaining and have some perfect options to satisfy your red desires here.

Spring brings the return of the ultimate outfit combinations: jeans + t-shirt paired with colour popping shoes, shorts/skirt + jumper, floaty dresses, the list just goes on. Lucky for you, our colourful, flattering picks for the spring ahead have you set and ready for the longer evenings ahead.

 

 

Words by Catherine Stabb, images sourced from Tumblr & Pinterest. 

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Parisian Confidence

There is something ridiculously romantic about Paris. The beautiful old buildings. The streets lined with boutique florists and bouquets of baguettes. Not to mention the population of French Bulldogs…. but as we were sitting on the street inhaling our crepes, the main thing that caught my attention was the Parisian Women. Timelessly classic, basket bag in hand and walking with confidence. As we sat there, we noticed that there was one thing all the French Women strolling past us seemed to have in common.

They were attractive no doubt, but they walked with purpose. Acting like they had woken up looking effortlessly chic, when in fact upon closer inspection their make up said otherwise. A Parisian Woman could be have having an awful day, however she’s not going to show you that. Instead making you want to dress like her, look like her and maybe even be her. Our model Sasha in the Malaia Dress encapsulates this feeling so well.

While American Celebrities often think revealing outfits that leave little to the imagination may be the key to sexiness, the French Women prefer to play with nonchalance, revealing enough to create the desire and wanting of more. You can find our interpretations of this style here, here and here. The Parisian Women, glowing with confident attitude will give you a subtle smile, look away and walk off knowing you’ll be left gazing.

Next time you feel like you need a little boost of confidence – follow the Parisian way. Mess your hair a little, apply your favourite red lipstick and walk tall. Look and act confident, and feeling confident will follow.

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Best Dressed at the 2017 VMAs

Paris Jackson

This girl has gone from strength to strength on the red carpet lately – and this Christian Dior number tops it for us. We may even be getting something slightly similar coming in September….

Millie Bobby Brown

We may be a little biased because we have something similar – but Millie is rocking this sheer look with metallic dots by Rodarte

Alessandra Ambrosio

This girl can do no wrong. Clashing detail to result in a delicate/edgy look. See similar here.

Lorde

Our fellow Kiwi gal made headlines by taking to the stage sans singing – however we think she really stole the show in the stunning Monique Lhuillier piece.

 

INGLEWOOD, CA – AUGUST 27: Lorde attends the 2017 MTV Video Music Awards at The Forum on August 27, 2017 in Inglewood, California. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)
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Confidence Issue: Everydayclosetnz – Mykala & Lillie

How many times have you ordered a dreamy dress online, tracked it obsessively and couldn’t wait to receive it?! Only to open your delivered package to a disappointing colour, fit and length. It’s happened to the best of us. But there’s a new game changer on the online shopping scene.

Everydayclosetnz is run by two confident and fashion forward kiwi girls from Dunedin. They order garments online and review the delivered garment on their Instagram – everything we never knew we needed. Their truth is evident in each post, giving total honesty about how each garment has made them feel. However, the turning point that made us so interested in these two kiwi gals, was when Mykala posted a photo and caption of her struggle with online shopping, hoping their instagram profile will encourage others to feel more confident with their online purchasing.

Who is Every Day Closet NZ?

Mykala: I’m 19 years old, and I am an event and nightlife photographer

Lillie: I’m 20 years currently in third year of my Media and Communications degree at University of Otago.

We are best friends in Dunedin NZ who have grown up together with our brothers & our other best friend Caitlin. We all lived on the same street and are the same age, so we spent most of our childhood with each other and our families.

What made you want to be involved in the fashion world?

Lillie: My Nanna was a huge part of my decision to be involved in the fashion world. She used to take me Saturday morning shopping. She encouraged me to dress the way I wanted to and allowed me creative freedom from such a young age. She made me feel as though the fashion world was my own personal heaven.

Mykala: Honestly I never saw myself in the fashion world up until we started EverydayCloset NZ. I have seen myself as a fashion photographer & have always liked nice clothes and a good sense of style but never to be actually involved.

 What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life? 

Mykala: Confidence is so many different things to me, you can be confident in yourself and your beliefs but you can also be confident in your looks. I approach this by being comfortable in who I am and knowing that what I say, do & look like is true to myself. 

Lillie: I agree with Mykala that confidence is projected in so many ways, in my everyday life I feel as though I approach it through my fashion. Look good, feel good.

 What empowers you as women?

Lillie: Seeing other women make positive change and influencing others is empowering. Women are such a strong gender and seeing a woman kick ass in fashion, cooperate, political, and other life aspects is what empowers me.

Mykala: Being Pacific Islander/European woman, it is empowering to be able to be a part of both cultures and combine what I learn from both and make myself a stronger woman. 

 What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that? 

Mykala: I learnt to find strategies to fix the problem or issue in my work and personal life. When I lost my photography job out of no where, I let it effect my confidence at first but I thought, if I can’t work for you I’m going to go out on my own & prove to you and myself I can do what you are doing but better. It has paid off completely because I dealt with it and overcome it. I showed myself and them I proved you wrong, you can do anything to set your mind to if you let yourself be confident and believe in yourself.

Lillie: When I work hard and don’t get the desired results either in workouts, assignments, work or family life then I feel my confidence lower. I deal with this by expressing how I feel either in a diary (if you don’t have one, you’re missing out), eat a block of chocolate and move on (if that’s the only option) or work harder at achieving the goal.

How has confidence helped you with starting up your Instagram and putting yourselves out there publicly?

Lillie: When I was in high-school I was constantly comparing myself to others, there was always someone fitter, skinnier and prettier than me. I left high-school and found my confidence and started to back myself but never forgot what I felt. My confidence has let me put myself out there publicly but my experience with self doubt has inspired and pushed me to put myself out there.

Mykala: Having to put my body on Instagram in a way that I never have before. My personal account is my lifestyle, so putting up images of myself in clothing that isn’t always flattering has been so hard but getting such an amazing response and expressing my own difficulties with my body is helping other woman feel more confident is making it worth it.

Do you see Every Day Closet NZ helping empower other women? If so, how?

Most definitely, our motivation for this is to be able to create a safe place on the internet for women to feel like they can be themselves. That no matter what your body shape, size or colour you can look and feel confident. We want woman to share their own reviews, we want to create a sense of reliability for them on every part of the spectrum. We are reviewing clothes but we are trying to make it more about self confidence and the feeling about yourself before you wear the garment. 

 What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Lillie: Confidence starts from within. If you don’t back yourself then who will? My biggest thing is that you can change your exterior but you can’t change your soul so you have to love it, there has to be a certain level of self obsession/love to be confident.

Mykala: A garment can assist in your confidence but isn’t going to ultimately make you confident because confidence doesn’t come over night you have to be patience with learning to love yourself on the inside and out.

 What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world? 

Mykala: My grey jacket. I worked my butt off to buy this coat so I feel very empowered and grateful at the same time as I have made it available to myself to be able to afford to wear this. 

Lillie: A body-con red dress. The colour is vibrant, its loud, powerful, eye-catching and attractive. When I wear a red dress I feel unstoppable.

 Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Mykala: Yes, even last year I thought you had to show more skin to feel confident and good but it is not the case for me. I feel most confident when I’m wearing a style or piece of clothing which is my own not what i think i have to wear to fit in. If I want to wear my Doc martens I will but if i want to wear a lower cut top I will as well.

Lillie: Yes, I have worn bodycon dresses in more recent years and as my confidence has grown I wear more fashion statement clothing such as flared pants and pink jackets. Knowing what my styles flatter my body has also evoloved my dress sense.

What women inspire you?

Mykala: My Nan, she is a women who knows she can do anything she set her mind too, she has shown me how to love yourself but not to be selfish to be have to half women she is would be a achievement.

Lillie: You’re a product of your upbringing and I would not be who I am or where I am without being inspired by the woman in my family. These inspirational women have inspired me to be a hardcore feminism, to self respect and love, to be confident and elegant all while being myself. 

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

We have not had the pleasure of trying garments from the Borrowed Collective yet so stay tuned on our Instagram for a review!

Thanking you,

Lillie Rohan and Mykala Tuxford

 

The girls will be reviewing the Starcrossed Lover & Shadow Dance Crossover this weekend so make sure you follow them to see their review! 

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UK Bloggers – Our Favourite of 2017

Since I made the little transition from NZ to the UK a little over two months ago, I’ve been on the look for constant inspiration, resulting in a lot of time consuming what I can from the UK Fashion Bloggers. I’m talking endless Instagram scrolling.

One of my first (and still is) girl crushes is Alexa Chung. Coming from lil ol New Zealand, we can be a bit too safe sometimes, but Alexa introduced the romance of pairing a frilly dress with converse or boots. From binge watching her fashion series with British Vogue, I was so intrigued with London fashion and the freedom of having no rules when it comes to style.

Lucy Williams – Fashion Me Now

I’m sure Lucy needs no introduction. She probably takes up most of your Pinterest feed with her travel pictures and her effortlessly cool style. The girl is addicted to denim, layering tee’s under silk cami’s or soft wrap dresses with white sneakers and a basket bag. She could just as well be the face of Realisation Par. Which without a doubt inspired me to purchase the Kate Dress and Alexandra dress for you ladies to be able to feel and look just as good as Lucy. There’s something so similar of New Zealand and Australian style about Lucy that makes her feel familiar. If you’re having a bad wardrobe day, I recommend going to Fashion Me Now for a little inspo into how to reintroduce an old piece into your current wardrobe rotation. Or to pair with your next rental to feel more comfortably chic and casual. I would also DEFINITELY recommend you get on her book club train.

Photo Credit: fashionmenow.co.uk

Jessie Bush – We The People

This one may be a tiny bit biased… this babe is originally from New Zealand. And although she doesn’t seem to be in one place for too long, I’m going to count her towards being a UK Blogger. This second blonde on our list is another clear example of inspiration every girl needs when heading towards her closet. Jessie has the perfect mix of a Copenhagen-like street style minimalist mixed with a little London pop of classic and colour. Her lifestyle, fashion and beauty posts are always a great read – as well as the fact she recently taught us how to style and rock fake cool-girl braids (life saver). This travelling beauty will have you pinning her outfit and planning your next trip abroad.

Photo Credit: wethepeoplestyle.com

Camille Charriere- Camilleovertherainbow

I first came across this Paris born Londoner when I was interning last year at Selfridges Creative Team. Camille is exactly what she sounds like. Effortlessly chic. I fell even more head over heels when I started listening to the podcast she co-hosts with Monica Ainley, Fashion No Filter, where they discuss the behind the scenes of Haute Couture, Fashion Week, what men think about our favourite trends and interview the likes of famous street-style photographers and my favourite, Susan Sarandon. If you ever wanted a little bit of fashion schooling, indulging in clothes talk and an insight into the industry, they’re your gals.

Photo Credit: camilleovertherainbow.com

Liv Purvis – What Olivia Did

Liv is a bit of a recent addition to this group for me. I discovered her through a youtube video she did with Lucy & immediately began following on all platforms. Liv is like the girl you want to be best friends with, sharing wardrobes and forgetting to return your favourite dress of hers. She is extremely relatable and has a youtube channel that the online shopper in me should not go near, for fear we share too much of the same love of & other stories and bath products. Maybe it’s the use of pink & baby blues in her aesthetic on her website but there is something on her blog that will have you consumed down the rabbit hole of reading each and every post.

Photo Credit: whatoliviadid.com

You can follow all our favourites below:

@lucywilliams02

@wethepeoplestyle

@camillecharriere

@livpurvis

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Confidence Issue: Brand Babes Studio – Alarice Stuart

In our journey to building our self confidence, nailing our goals and creating the best life possible each day, every gal needs a little inspo. A little inspo, a dreamy aesthetic and some kick ass mottos reminding ourselves what we are truly about.

Alarice from Brand Babes Studio is one kick ass gal who sends positive girl power vibes into our life everyday. Not only is her story super inspiring, but it also can give us strength to build our wildest dreams – living for yourself.

Who is Alarice Stuart?

She is a design obsessed solo mum constantly planning and dreaming of her next travel destination with her overly active toddler while judging mum life and running a full time freelance graphic design business.

What made you want to be involved in the branding world?

It’s not some much the “branding world” per say as I think we live in a brand centric world so whether we like it or not we are all involved in the branding world. It’s more so that coming up with the idea of working with small biz babes to create killer brands stemmed from a gap in the market. So many woman are starting businesses and running one woman shows – but there just didn’t seem to be that design business that was hitting the nail on the head.

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

I think confidence is something that needs to be worked on – its a skill not something people wake up with. Confidence and self awareness go hand in hand. Know your flaws, your strengths and your weaknesses but so focused on doing you that it all just doesn’t matter. I approach it everyday with a deep breath, gratitude and “babe, you got this!” type of attitude.

What empowers you as a woman?

Being a woman in itself is empowering. We are such majestic creatures! Like seriously we really can do it all – grow humans, birth them, raise them, some of us raising them on our own, run a business, keep your eyebrows on fleek, hair did, nails did , geez what else right?!

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

Disappointing others – its a hard one. Like if a client is not happy. It’s a damn hard pill to swallow. Just got to remember you can’t please everyone and be ok with that.

How has confidence helped you with quitting your corporate job and starting your own business?

It made me go all in! Like being totally scared but completely getting rid of the “what if” and turning it into “the time is now, babe”

Do you see your role with Brand Babes Studio helping empower other women? If so, how?

I hope so! I share my story a lot about how I am a solo mum who lost her job and then moved back home to New Zealand and started my business because I know that if I had heard a story like that a year ago I would have been so inspired! We have to share our stories – even if it only inspires one person.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

 There really is only one of you! That truly is your power. Believe that we all have a purpose and that you will find yours. Be confident in that – in you!

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

I love a good hat – it can make you got from “Basic” to “Babe!” in all of two seconds.

Do you think your style and the way you dress has evolved as you have become more confident within yourself?

Yes! Totally! I wear whatever I want – how I want – whenever I want. Because I am so comfortable in who I am.

What women inspire you?

I was raised by two strong woman – my mum and grandma. Like seriously they are the definition of GirlBoss for way back when that life didn’t even exist. These days it wouldn’t be so Odd but think about it like this – it’s the 90s and two working woman are raising one really full on girl. Taking her to swimming lessons, computer lessons and then immigrating from South Africa to New Zealand.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Talulah Staccato Contrast Jumpsuit – because how can you not feel confident in a black jumpsuit?

 

You can find Alarice’s business on Instagram here or on her website xx

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What I Never Believed I Could Do

Last month I did something that a year ago I never would’ve believed I could do.

I moved to the other side of the world. By myself.

I left my comforting safety net of my close friends & family to start a journey that initially was just a University paper, turned into a bit of a way to be creative and use what I was learning.

I knew it was a big step to take my little business to the other side of the world. But in the same way I felt when I took the business over by myself, my gut instinct told me this was what I needed to do. I felt like I had outgrown NZ and what I wanted to achieve in the NZ rental market. While I am confident the girls I have safely left the NZ store in the hands of have it under control, I felt like if I didn’t take the opportunity to take on the UK market I wouldn’t be achieving my goals the way I initially set out to.

Moving has meant that I have had to leave my favourite humans and my support system, but it has also allowed me to be involved in a different field I never thought I would be involved in. When I came to London on an internship last year I saw a niche and I figured if I didn’t move over and I didn’t do it fast then I would regret it. I feel so privileged to work with the amazing TBC girls I work with, the lovely ladies we rent to and that both parties I have developed close friendships with.Being so passionate about my love for what I do, I felt that it was something I needed to explore overseas.

Don’t get me wrong, the fact I can pop over to Greece or France cheaper than it costs to go to Queenstown for the weekend surely has it’s benefits, but I am also at the stage where I am working longer than full time hours during the week, pretty much alone at this stage. But I am really hoping it pays off. And my little secret project that will be revealed in a few months time may prove to not only myself but my loyal followers that it has paid off…

I feel like I have been so blessed to be approached and be working with the incredible Australian brands that I do (the best you are yet to find out about). But none of that would’ve happened if I didn’t believe in myself or listen to the people around me. Confidence is funny like that. Sometimes it can feel like the people who you surround yourself with believe in you more than you do.

Since starting Something Borrowed and taking it over myself to become The Borrowed Collective, confidence has played a major role in both the growth of my business and myself. I think I am a bit of a classic example of “fake it till you make it”, however I have met so many incredible women who have changed my perception on being confident. I like to share their knowledge with you in our confidence issue pieces. Mostly because I want The Borrowed Collective to be a place where you come to be inspired, enhance your confidence and join us in striving to be the you, you want to be. Whether that is through the ability to wear designer pieces at an affordable price or be confident to take a major leap to the other side of the world.

I don’t know about you, but knowing we are all in the same boat trying to achieve our goals helps me. Sometimes you just need to know that you aren’t alone in trying to girlboss it, wear the latest trend or push yourself to take a leap of faith not knowing the outcome.

Lots of Love,

Ashleigh x

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Confidence Issue: The Bella Edit – Belinda Nash

I first met Belinda at a product launch and was immediately attracted to her energy and her ability to light up the entire room. From attending Fashion Week with her, numerous vinos and dress up sessions, she is always an amazing sound board and an incredible inspiration not only with her work ethic but her ability to love herself that I think we can all work on.

Who is Belinda Nash?

Hi! My name is Belinda, and I’m a freelance writer, blogger and a new fashion and beauty editor for Express mag on a mission to inspire guys, gals and everyone in between to be the best they can be. As for who I am I’m yet to uncover that mystery! I am always learning, growing and changing and I am more pleased every day with what I discover about myself. I genuinely love me… and it’s been a long time coming!!

What does confidence mean to you and how do you approach this in your everyday life?

This is an interesting one. Intrinsically, I think we like to belong and to help each other, so recently I joined six other women on a rape campaign here during Rape Awareness Week. Not only did the campaign make the Daily Mail in the UK, but I was able to talk on The Project, The Rock and a two hour session on Newstalk ZB to share my personal story about being raped, and more importantly, share my diagnosis of PTSD and how I worked through it with a therapist and a psychologist to come out the other end. Yay!

What empowers you as a woman?

So many things!! Most importantly, I love having achieved so well in education. I have a couple of degrees, a few diplomas, a post graduate diploma, and a Master of Philosophy degree with first class honours. I value intelligence and academia so much, particularly as for so many women in the world, getting an education remains out of their reach. The other important thing is I know that I am a kind person. I’m not mean, judgmental or hurtful to people. I don’t put people down, and I am not divisive in my character. If people dislike me, I know it’s their problem not mine because I know I haven’t been an arsehole to them! I mostly feel sorry for people who behave badly towards others. They lack the big picture.

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

Duplicity. People who present one personality but are actually cruelly intentioned and manipulative deserve no place in my world. I have experienced this a few times, and it has battered my confidence. But I am extremely proud and happy to say that I am so very done with these people. I find them pointless and ridiculous, and their actions against me and opinions of me don’t matter one bit. It’s taken a lot of work to get here, but it makes me smile at how utterly pathetic they are (in the pathos sense, not in the I’m being mean, sense, so: “miserably inadequate”). It actually makes me laugh to myself now thinking that they think I care, or that I don’t know what game they’re playing. Laughter is the best medicine!

How has confidence helped with the running nzgirl and starting The Bella Edit?

It’s been amazing! I’ve had the opportunity to go to so many incredible events, and interview and meet some outstanding people, and this fuels me. Talented, authentic people totally spin my wheels, and I have met too many to mention! I need to put a rocket up The Bella Edit though, because I have so many ideas and well… not enough time. But in doing nzgirl, I have shared so much of myself and that in itself is empowering because I’ve had to really think about life in possibly more detail than others have had the opportunity to do. And through sharing my real self, I’ve allowed others to hopefully realise it’s OK to be imperfectly perfect (or is it perfectly imperfect?). It’s OK to be vulnerable, to be sensitive, to care and to not be cookie-cutter magazine model perfect.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves, embracing themselves for who they really are?

Believing in yourself is a must. I believe in my intelligence, my talent and my unique view of the world (and we all have this!!!). But I’ll be honest, embracing myself for who I really am is a double-edged sword. On one hand, I love being a bit weird, but on the other hand I sometimes think life would be so much easier being mainstream, yunno? But I need to be in a job that I feel passionate about and if I don’t, then I feel myself wither away. A cubicle sitting under fluoro lights and having meetings about meetings just isn’t me. But some days I just wish I could care less (and earn more)… but then I just wouldn’t be me. So for yourselves, just work out who you are, accept you and love you just the way you are, then anything else will be a bonus. And most importantly, surround yourself with the people who love and support you just the way you are – as completely and wonderfully you. In a world where we’re overloaded with picture perfect lives, remember that ultimately, all we want is to love and be loved, because that’s all that really matters.

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

I LOVE leather jackets, especially biker jackets. They make me feel kickass! I have lost too many of them (grrrrr!) but I have replaced them and still have some oldies-but-goodies that I love, including an ‘80s biker jacket that is too retro for words. My new fave is from Urbancode London and it slaaaaays – you can see a tiny sneak peek here! I wish I could afford more of them and just wear jackets; jackets make an outfit in autumn and winter!

What women inspire you?

Oh wow… So many. Helen Clark for for being bold, brave and honest, and standing tall in a man’s world. I also want to be Iris Apfel when I grow up – that woman is a style bawse! Laura Daniel and Kimberley Crossman for being funny, intelligent, beautiful and all round badass. My mum for adopting me. My sister because she’s an A&E nurse and is just kickass, frickin amazing!!! My sister-in-laws for being so bloody kind and wise. My three best girlfriends who have been my rocks over these changing times – they know me better than I know myself and every day give me the courage to wake up and show up each day. And yep, I talk to them (almost) every day!! They’re my cheerleading crew and I wanna kiss their faces!!!!

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

Ashleigh has SUCH good taste, I just cannot!!! I love her Zimmerman and Talulah picks, and nothing beats a cute Jumpsuit, but this Mon Cheri Midi Dress is sooooo frickin’ adorable… I must have!!!

You can see Belinda pictured below in our Mon Cheri. 

Thanks lovely lady xx

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Confidence Issue: Monday Hustle – Lucy O’Connor

Since TBC was still Something Borrowed, Lucy O’Connor aka Monday Hustle came in to my life. She serves not as just a friend and super amazing support system, but as an inspiration and a good pick me up every Monday morning. Her hilarious and honest posts are too relatable at times, but also just what every girl hustler needs. This chick is the definition of hustle and bravery and we were lucky enough to get a little inside her head this week on what confidence means to her.

Who are you?

 

I’m Lucy, the blogger behind Monday Hustle! In July 2015, I quit my solid 9-5 in favour of.. Well, nothing!! But something told me I had to make a commitment and start to actively search for what it was that set my soul on fire. Ever since, I’ve been trying to gain experience in areas I feel passionate about, meaning that it’s been a tough 18 months of financial insecurity and lots of rejection!! However, there is no way I’d change any thing, and I finally feel like through Monday Hustle, I’ve been able to find my calling.
Monday Hustle is a space where people can feel confident in knowing they are capable of tackling life’s challenges, whatever might come at them next. I back you to back yourself, and soon, I’ll be offering life coaching services so I can help people learn from my experiences of living the Hustle at a more personal level.
PLUS, my friend Cam and I are going into business together on a second project which is super exciting! Even though my 2017 has been a roller-coaster ride due to a snapped Achilles.. I still get the feeling it’s gonna be an epic year.
What does confidence mean to you?
Confidence is a state of mind. It’s a work in progress. It’s first letting go of the fact that you can’t control everything, second valuing your worth and third living in a way that stays true to who you are and what impact you want to have on the world. Confidence doesn’t have to mean dressing like a boss, working as a CEO or always feeling positive. It’s understanding that, much like happiness, you can’t always exist in a 100% confident state. You have to work at it, and build resilience to the things that knock that confidence down. It’s feeling like what you are working towards is a worthy thing, and trying to bring that fact to mind when the doubt comes creeping in.
What empowers you as a women?
What empowers me as a human is embracing every aspect of myself, mind body soul. It’s knowing that there is no other person like me that has existed ever. It’s enjoying all of my talents and my strengths, and working on my weaknesses where applicable. It’s knowing that life is cumulative, and that every experience exists to teach us something whether it’s good or bad. We can either learn from the negative, or we can berate ourselves, but I feel empowered in knowing fundamentally that I hold the key to choose which option I’ll take.
What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?
 
SO MANY THINGS knock my confidence, but the main one at the moment is the devil that is comparison. Last December, I snapped my Achilles. Everything was going so well before that, and I felt really on track – but then everything literally came to a halt! There were several complications with the tendon, and I spent a few weeks in hospital, which meant I had to tap out of Monday Hustle for a while to focus completely on recovery. When I entered back into the game, it felt as if everyone else had streaked ahead of me and were enjoying great successes while I was still stuck on crutches and questioning my life purpose. Of course, once I slipped into that mindset, I lost myself in the comparative void and my productivity went out the window.
I dealt with it by acknowledging the fact that I had just been through a horrible ordeal, and realized that now more than even, I needed to be kind to myself. I stopped looking at other people’s social media for a while so I could regain the focus on what I was doing. I reminded myself that I am the only me that exists, and that I am the only one who can do what I do in a me way – and that in itself propelled me forward.
When we are comparing ourselves to others, we act out of fear and out of desperation instead of joy and passion, and thus we lose sight of our own end goal. At the end of the day, you can’t control what anyone else does – you can only control what you do, and how you treat yourself – so you may as well join in the celebration, high five people for the successful payoffs they earn and get on with working toward a milestone of your own!
How has confidence helped with your journey as a hustler?
 
Without confidence, I’d still be in a 9-5 sales role, possibly earning a sh*tload of cash, but still feeling gravely unhappy and unfulfilled. I think there is a myth that confidence is innate, and we associate confidence with things like public speaking and being extroverted. However, I think confidence is getting up in the morning. It’s getting out the door. It’s showing up every day, even when you don’t feel like it. The funny thing is, I still don’t feel confident with what I’m doing or where I’m going, even though from the outside it might seem like I have it all together (occasionally!)!! I’m sitting in my flat having just heard the news that I’ll be on crutches for five more weeks, it’s raining outside and I am craving a bag of chips which I don’t have and still I still have doubts as to whether what I am doing is valuable.
But, it’s only because of my journey as a hustler that I now understand that confidence is a byproduct of action, not the other way round. I wasn’t feeling confident when I quit my job. I wasn’t feeling confident when I published my first blog post. It’s rare that I feel confident showing up at an event!! But, the more you get out of your comfort zone, the more you feel confident in knowing that whatever the outcome, whether it’s the one you hoped for a the one you really didn’t want, you’ll be able to handle it and move forward a stronger person.
What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves to achieve their dreams as you did with Monday Hustle?
 

The only advice I can give to you is to make like Nike and just do it. As above, confidence is a byproduct of action, and it’s only by doing that we become more confident in knowing more about who we are and what we are capable of. It’s a beautifully terrifying thing indeed – but also strangely comforting, and extremely motivating because at the end of the day? If you never try – you never know. And what’s better than surprising yourself?

 

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

 
Normally, block heels make me feel pretty badass. There’s something really grounding about hearing those blocks hit the floor as you walk towards a scary meeting, presentation or stage! The rhythm of your movement is soothing and reassuring, and the sound of your own feet moving you forward gives you literal and metaphorical momentum. It says, ‘I’m here doing this right now, and I’m gonna do it bloody well. Clip, clop.’ Have I gone too deep on this?!

Clothing wise, it would have to be my vintage leather biker jacket. That thing is impenetrable! It’s an extra layer of armour when all else fails.

 

What women inspire you?

 
Maya Angelou. Sophia Amoruso. Iris Apfel. Brené Brown. Oprah. Any woman who is embracing everything it means to be authentically themselves, despite what the rule books might say. Women who are using their platforms to do good, and who remain open and vulnerable along the way. I would like to think that they would be proud of Monday Hustle and might feel empowered by some of my posts, too!
Thanks Lucy you incredible thang! You can see her pictured below in our Kate Dress at the Awesome Hustle event xxx

 

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Confidence Issue: RefinedBy – Tessa Stockdale

At TBC we love a good inspirational #GIRLBOSS. Tessa Stockdale from the blog RefinedBy is definitely one strong lady across all social media platforms that we look to for a little empowerment in our day.

We were lucky enough to have a chat to her about confidence and her key tips for success & motivation.

Who is Tessa Stockdale?

A twenty-one year old woman with a million things on the go. From fashion, to health, family, politics and friends – I couldn’t tell you a time where a new thought or idea isn’t running through my mind. I completed a Bachelor of Commerce at University of Auckland majoring in Commercial Law and Marketing. I am a fast-paced and mature woman with a headstrong perspective on life. I have a ‘take-no-shit’ attitude yet I can be the friendliest person you will meet. I work hard, make mistakes, succeed and learn. You’ll find me attempting not to die in one of Les Mills’ GRIT classes, or nestled in a cafe preparing and writing content for clients and my website, RefinedBy. On the weekends I’m out brunching, meeting friends or flying around the country to discover new places.

What does confidence mean to you?

Confidence to me is being happy with yourself. It is time that we enjoy who we are including our imperfections. Confidence goes beyond physical appearance, it is being proud of your achievements, your knowledge and your heritage. It isn’t an easy thing to grasp,  it takes time to build, but once you get it, you’ll never be happier.

What empowers you as a women?

The ability to live in a country and a society where I can be who I want to be, do what I want to do and be happy because of it. I am empowered by the many female role models I have in my life. Their strength and courage to make change has played a huge part in my confidence and empowerment. There are two very real issues in New Zealand that spark my passion and empowerment for change: the gender pay gap and our laws on abortion. I could expand on these, but we may be here for a while!

What knocks your confidence down and how do you deal with that?

The biggest thing that affects my confidence would be my anxiety. It’s time to break the stigma surrounding mental illness because the reality is, most of us, if not all of us will struggle with depression or anxiety at some stage in our lives. My anxiety tends to makes me worry about interactions with people and social situations. This is a very common thing people with anxiety face. The great thing is I am blessed to have amazing friends and family around me to help me take control of my anxiety. It’s important to be gentle with yourself and speak to people who can help you.

How has confidence helped with the start and running of RefinedBy?

I knew that I wanted to start my own business since I was a young girl. I am also lucky to be naturally confident, therefore the combination of the two really helped to begin RefinedBy. The deciding factor for me to create RefinedBy were my friends and family. They were incredibly supportive and encouraging to the point that it gave me all the confidence I needed to go out and make it a reality. The launch night was so nerve racking but our family, friends and invited media made it incredible. I guess no matter how confident you are by yourself, if you have the right people around you, you can end up feeling as though you can take on the world.

What advice would you give our customers about self confidence and believing in themselves?

Confidence comes with time. Don’t beat yourself up, because you’ll get there. Do the things in life you love and push the boundaries. Be gentle with yourself and be kind to others. There is so much bad shit going on in the world that we need to look after one another. Love yourself, love your neighbour and know that everyone is beautiful – we just don’t always see it. You are your biggest fan and if you don’t believe in yourself, how can anyone else?

What piece of clothing makes you feel confident to take on the world?

My go to outfit for confidence is a tailored blazer and pant paired with my Valentinos and a lick of lipstick – M.A.C Russian Red or Smashbox First Time. Do not underestimate the power of lipstick.

What women inspire you?

There are three groups of women who have inspired me and continue to inspire me in different aspects of my life.

As cliché as it is, my mother is my lifelong inspiration. She is the strongest, most kind-hearted and driven person I’ve had in my life. She simply is incredible. She raises five children, studies part time and works in a senior position at the Ministry of Business Innovation and Employment. She gives her time as a volunteer at Waikato Hospital’s neonatal unit while continuing to be the ultimate role model to me and my siblings. She projects love and kindness to everyone and would help a stranger in a heart beat. If I can be half the person she is, I will be happy.

My creative inspiration comes from the amazing likeminded women all over the world. Sara Donaldson of Harper & Harley, Eleanor Pendleton of Gritty Pretty and Nicole Warne of Gary Pepper Girl. These women not only inspire me with the work they produce but their manner, hard work and ethic. They have succeeded and changed the industry because of their willingness to push the creative boundaries, take a step forward and make a change.

Last but not least, my beautiful friends. These girls give me happiness like no one else. I can’t name them all but without them, I would truly be lost. Their support, kindness and care throughout my life, and especially during the years of RefinedBy, is priceless. Those days where I needed a grammar check, an opinion, an Instagram photographer or a hug – they were there. I guess you could say that they are the most important people in my life.

What’s your favourite piece out of The Borrowed Collective and why?

The Bec & Bridge White Rock Set is an absolute favourite. Nothing screams empowerment and confidence like a tailored yet sophisticated pant and top combination. I would pair this with a pair of nude pumps and a red lip. A black long sleeve layered underneath would make it perfect for an autumn or winter event.